Do white guys really have an advantage?

[HarutoAsou]

I'm posting this in the Japanese section because I believe it will be relevant here aside from the fact my experiences are in Korea.

Do white guy really have an advantage when meeting Korean/Japanese/whatever girls. Now before you jump to conclusions and tell me it's all about the guy and how he holds himself, yes I do agree on that, but only partially.

I was recently talking to my Korean co-teacher (the guy who helps me when I have no idea WTF the children are screaming at me) and he was asking me how to pick up girls, because he is single and he knows I've had numerous girl friends in the past. I was thinking about the easiest way for me to meet girls and break the ice and I realized this wouldn't work for east Asians.

Whether it be in Canada or Korea (or Japan if anyone could shed some light on the subject for me) it's rather easy for me to walk up to a Korean and/or Japanese girl and start to speak Korean/Japanese and it's an immediate ice breaker and a slight shock factor (Korean more so because it's not as main stream as Japanese).

In Korea there are two types of people, foreigners and Koreans. If you look Asian, you are Korean. There is no difference to them. I can't count the amount of times I've been with Japanese friends in Korea or even international students from Canada and just because they are Asian all Koreans assume they are Korean and talk to them in Korean. Then they stare at me in awe when I explain in Korean that they are not Korean but I can speak it a little. Having said that, Koreans will not be impressed if you are east Asian (I'm saying this because Indians amongst others are Asian too) and can speak Korean, Koreans expect it.

However in the case of Canada (and I would assume America) we are fairly different. I agree with the notion that if you live in a foreign country to better damn well speak the language, otherwise you are an ignorant fool, but Japan and Korea don't see it that way. They expect foreigners to not give a shit about their culture and spew English 24/7. In Canada though if a Korean or Japanese or anyone walks up to a Canadian girl and speak English, it's like "wow, so what? You live in Canada, you should speak English."

So do white guys really have a slight advantage when it comes to meeting certain types of girls over east Asians? I'm saying this not taking into consideration that the east Asian guy could be a complete pussy and not have the balls to talk to a woman. Assuming 2 guys are almost exactly alike and one is east Asian and one in Caucasian, who has the upper hand?

 

[Ceewan]

???

maybe........

I am not personally fond of racial type subject matter, on the internet we are all the same color,(which is kinda nice and relaxing I think). It isn't that way in real life though. So maybe many people are interested in something different and unusual to them. Perhaps this carries over into physical attractions. I would not be surprised but I wouldn't want to say that this is a given fact in every situation either.

 

[aquamarine]

Ask the same question, but reverse it around a little bit.

Why are so many non-asians attracted to asian women?

One word. Exotic.

That is a big factor as well - don't forget that women in this part of the world have typically two things in mind...
1) They want a white boyfriend (or at least a distinctly foreign boyfriend) to show they are stylish, cool, unique and in demand with outsiders.
2) They want a husband so they can leave their current location (Read: Thailand, Philippines)

 

[lowleg26]

They want a white boyfriend (or at least a distinctly foreign boyfriend) to show they are stylish, cool, unique and in demand with outsiders

I'm wondering if the idea of using your partner as a fashion accessory is something endemic to all industrialized nations?

I can't be the only person in the US to have run across misguided, upper class, white youths desperate to get a black girlfriend to show how "hip" and "urban" they are. As if your date's skin tone automatically imbues you with a deep understanding of race relations.

 

[Aqua2213]

1) They want a white boyfriend (or at least a distinctly foreign boyfriend) to show they are stylish, cool, unique and in demand with outsiders.

Wow! Talk about role reversal, now I'M Arm Candy!!:grassdance:

Hey, I was stationed in Korea for three years way back when and I took the time to learn some of the language and the folks there always appreciated when a foreigner like myself did take the time to learn a bit.

Doing that is only an ice breaker like OP said and after that it's looks, then what you got inside and how much you are worth monetarily running neck and neck.

Back here in the US, Koreans are still surprised when I whip out some language on them and they smile and grin and open right up to me and I have new friends.

Being an Asian male in Korea is like being peanut butter sandwich in a sandwich shop that only sells peanut butter sandwiches.
One day the beautiful Asian girl goes into the shop and low and behold, there is a hot Reuben sandwich on Rye amongst the masses of PB sandwiches.
Of course she is thrilled to have come across this new and exciting sandwich.
Now the deal maker is when she bites into it, will she like what's inside?uzzled:

Today, I have many girlfriends and many I have met by tossing out the few Korean phrases I still remember but hey, they work but that only starts the spark.
It's what I genuinely have to offer inside as Aqua that seals a lasting friendship and it doesn't matter what color, size or how much money I got ( I tell them I'm basically broke from the get go).

I got four Asian females coming to my place tomorrow afternoon and evening and it ain't my looks or money or language, it the hella good BBQ ribs I make that they are coming for, and my inner charm. :shy:
Bon Appétit!!

 

[HeiRen]

I have a question for the OP: Why are you comparing yourself to white guys?

I'm black or 'African-American,' if you will; if I like someone I talk to them. If they're not interested, I move on. (Yes, I do like Asian girls: Chinese or Taiwanese, in particular, since I'm interested in working in Taiwan in the future...and I'm studying Mandarin Chinese).

Don't get me wrong, I know of the 'racial climate' in certain countries(in this case, certain Asian countries)...but that shouldn't stop an individual in regards to work, dating, etc. However, if you want to date a certain type of girl, go ahead and talk to her...

 

[HarutoAsou]

I have a question for the OP: Why are you comparing yourself to white guys?

I'm black or 'African-American,' if you will; if I like someone I talk to them. If they're not interested, I move on. (Yes, I do like Asian girls: Chinese or Taiwanese, in particular, since I'm interested in working in Taiwan in the future...and I'm studying Mandarin Chinese).

Don't get me wrong, I know of the 'racial climate' in certain countries(in this case, certain Asian countries)...but that shouldn't stop an individual in regards to work, dating, etc. However, if you want to date a certain type of girl, go ahead and talk to her...

I'm not comparing myself to white guys because I am a white guy, it was just something that was on my mind because I really had nothing to help my co-teacher when he asked me to help him on how to meet girls.

Another thing I have noticed, that is clearly an advantage to being a foreigner in Korea is you can be extremely blunt and to the point and it doesn't make a difference. Once again, this can possibly be attributed to the fact that because Korean isn't my native language they let it slide but you can be talking to a girl and say "친구 하자, 번호 뭐야?" which literally means "we should be friends, what's your number?" and they don't mind at all. If you said that in English to an English speaker they would percieve you as being conceited and thinking you are hot shit. I actually told my co-teacher that I picked up a girl using that line and he was literally in awe that they didn't slap me.

Aquamarine, any comparison with Japan that you've had from personal experience?

In regards to why I personally like [specifically] Korean and Japanese girls? Culture. Once I started to learn about Korean and Japanese culture, which is probably the farthest thing from Canadian culture, I started to respect the girls for their values and history. If you respect someone for what they believe in and how they live that can be beautiful in itself, not even taking looks into consideration. That is perhaps why I started to find then so attractive from a physical standpoint. At one point or another it's inevitable. It's the same way you can fall in love with a girl for just her personality and then find her to be the most beautiful girl ever, hey it's happened to me once.

 

[onespiece]

I wouldn’t necessarily think Caucasians any sort of advantage when it comes to picking up, though I do hear some (including myself) love the blue eyes some may have. But what I do believe is that the minority are usually the most attracted in high density single-race countries (like china.)
It all depends on how polite/smart/attracted someone is to really get the opposite sex. My brother is currently dating a Korean while at the uni and previously dated a Vietnamese and 2 of my cousins (1male/1female) are dating a Chinese and the other Korean. We all came from S. America but currently live in N. America

 

[Sakunyuusha]

I'll offer a counterpoint from personal experiences (self and friends'). Anecdotes != the rule, but it's still another perspective all the same.

During my college years, all Asian girls with boyfriends had Asian boyfriends. Not all Asian boys with girlfriends had Asian girlfriends, though. Simply, there were no white male + Asian female pairings. Not for lack of white males' interest in Asian women! But the girls stuck to their own completely. This was a phenomenon witnessed -- rather, experienced first-hand -- by myself, by my white friends, and by my black friends.

I had a Chinese American friend in college who I once told this to. He said he felt 180° opposite: "Asian women don't want Asian boyfriends. They want foreign boyfriends." He voiced the opinions thus far voiced here. Based on personal experiences, I disagreed with him. And yet based on his own personal experiences, he disagreed with me.

The conclusion I reached? Asian girlfriends are hard to secure p-e-r-i-o-d. It doesn't matter whether you're Asian or not, whether you're homebred or not, whether your rich or poor, social elite or gangsta ghetto, built or lanky, smart or dumb: Asian girls are lusted after by a lot of guys and they disproportionately lust back after us very little.


I think I'm more inclined to agree with the OP's argument if we're talking about non-Asians living in an East Asian nation. But at that point I think it has less to do with race alone and more to do with the complete gaijin package -- different race, different nationality, different culture, different everything. As aquamarine so rightly called it, people often find themselves drawn towards the exotic, i.e. the unfamiliar, and so if you're a white guy in Korea, yeah, you probably have a big advantage over a Korean guy in Korea if/when we're talking Korean girls drawn towards the exotic. For the rest of the Korean female population who are no more nor less drawn towards exotic guys than domestic guys, I don't see an advantage. And as far as Koreans (or Japanese, or Chinese, etc) living in countries like Canada or the USA? I think white guys either have no advantage or have an actual disadvantage over dudes from the same home country as the girls. Here's a girl living in a world of whities (say we're in Canada). Kens and Barbies all around her. Then out of the blue she meets a familiar facial structure with a familiar dialect in her hometown of Whitesville, Canada. I'm tellin' you: that dude is 100x more likely to get her than any of the other dudes in town. Think of it as "reverse exoticism" if you will. Even though he's the same race and culture as she is, he's now the one who's perceived as exotic whereas all the white folks are the ones perceived as dime-a-dozen plain.

 

[hypemx7]

Very simply put,
White guys have an advantage with asian girls who have an affinity for white guys.
On average, girls of any nationality/culture prefer guys from the same culture.

Doesn't matter if they are Europeans or Asians.

North Americans, on the other hand (American and Canadian), seem to be more open to couplings of various cultures in comparison to other parts of the world.


Personally, didn't have any luck with an Asian girl I met off on the street, cafes or restaurants when I was over in South Korea or Japan.
However, there are several "cliques" of girls who go for white guys exclusively.
A small minority of course, but they are existent all across East Asian countries from what I can tell.

 

[bijipeler]

agree with hypemx7

 

[HarutoAsou]

this is greatly digressing though. I'm talking about a girl who doesn't care about race or looks. Wouldn't it be more advantegous for the white guy who is putting forth an effort to learn their language and their culture rather than the Asian guy who is just expected to know it. That is the point I'm trying to get at, this topic never had anything to do with race from a physical perspective, rather the stereotypes that come with races (white guys don't care about cultures other than their own, etc.)

White guy walks up to Korean girl and starts to talk in Korean, girls reaction OMG!
Korean guy walks up to Korean girl and starts to talk in Korean, girls reaction, fuck off.

In other words do foreigners in general have an advantage in picking up east Asian girls given the fact that we are stereotypically known to be culturally ignorant towards other cultures.

If you don't believe me goto Korea and check out half the jerk offs that are with the US Army. They ONLY visit Itaewon which is a small place that accepts American money rather than Korean won and everyone speaks English and serve pretty much everything but Korean food. That is the prime example of cultural ignorance that Koreans have towards a lot of foreigners.

 

[InvalidUsername08]

It can also depend on where you go. If I'm in Tokyo, Nagoya or Kyoto, I'm 1 in a boatload of white guys. You see tour busses full of whiteys all over Kyoto. But, if you visit some out of the way areas, you will get more interest. I love going to my wife's hometown to visit her parents and watching the people look at me like Gojira is standing there. Other than a few Brazilians, I am the only white guy for miles and miles. If I went there as a single guy, I guarantee I'd pick up some ladies. Nothing says you're the subject of conversation when an entire 120-ish person packed bar/restaurant stops to look at you hahaha that was fun and almost like a movie scene In Tokyo, it'd be more of a challenge.

 

[HarutoAsou]

perfect example of the type of response I was looking for ↑

 

[InvalidUsername08]

this is greatly digressing though. I'm talking about a girl who doesn't care about race or looks. Wouldn't it be more advantegous for the white guy who is putting forth an effort to learn their language and their culture

White guy walks up to Korean girl and starts to talk in Korean, girls reaction OMG!
Korean guy walks up to Korean girl and starts to talk in Korean, girls reaction, fuck off.

I speak a little bit of Canotnese and nothing got me more Chinese pussy than speaking Cantonese and speaking it pretty well and that was all in the USA. Perfect way to strike a convo is listening in to what they are speaking. Once I recognized the Cantonese dialect, I would talk to them a little. They may be stand-off-ish for a second until you say you can speak a little. When they test you, speak it and you'll be in a 20 minute convo before you know it. Hit your tones right and she's half wet because it shows you've put in the time. Rosetta Stone for $400 is well worth the amount of chicks you'll end up talking to versus walking up to them looking like a desperate American looking to get laid.

Even if the girls I was focused on didn't speak Cantonese, I'd ask them what dialect they spoke and a lot of the waitresses around here are speaking a dialect other than Mandarin. Typically Fujian. Once they tell me the dialect, I would insert I speak a bit of Cantonese and instant convo.

In other words do foreigners in general have an advantage in picking up east Asian girls given the fact that we are stereotypically known to be culturally ignorant towards other cultures.

Americans are known around the world for being some of the most worldly ignorant asses on the planet. Especially when they get arrested in a foreign country and like to announce that they're American like that is a free pass or something. Typically Americans know the leader of Canada and Mexico and that is about it.

If you prefer cambodian or viet or japanese or chinese ladies, it would behoove you to skip the asian website billing and replace-the-expiring-condom purchases for a while and invest in some language tapes or classes. Some big cities have community classes that don't cost much. What is the worst that can happen? They get pissed you listened in on their conversation? So what. Tell them you picked up a couple words and wanted to see how much you could understand. Got a couple numbers that way myself.

 

[aquamarine]

Wait wait wait a moment.... "Most americans know the leader of Canada..."???? You must have been spending time with Harvard grad intellectuals, my friend. Ask anyone from the US while in the US and I'd wager that more than 95% wouldn't be able to name Canada's "president"!

 

[Rollyco]

I guessed correctly... "Stephen Harper." One of the benefits of occasionally catching CBC rebroadcast on public radio.

 

[lowleg26]

You must have been spending time with Harvard grad intellectuals, my friend. Ask anyone from the US while in the US and I'd wager that more than 95% wouldn't be able to name Canada's "president"!

This is an unfortunate reality, but you're absolutely right. Most Americans barely know anything about their own country, let alone know the political figures of other countries (even if they are our neighbors).

I think your estimate of 95% is a bit low, though. I could name a few places you'd probably see 100% of respondents say either "I don't know" or, more likely, "Who cares?" 'Cause we're classy like that. :negligent:

Americans are known around the world for being some of the most worldly ignorant asses on the planet

That's a well earned title. I've personally met people here who can't name all 50 states or the 3 branches of our government. I've also personally met people here who, honest to god, CAN'T FIND CHINA ON A MAP! I really wish that was a joke.

A lot of this ignorance is blissfully willful, and, if you confined yourself to reading or viewing only mainstream American news or media, its very easy to become insulated. The way a lot of things are discussed and matters are treated here, you'd almost think we were the only country around!

Sorry to rant, but, in relation to the thread's subject, I wonder if being an American would put you at a disadvantage with many people (men or women) in other countries. Like, are Canadians more readily accepted by people of different cultures because they don't have these negative associations weighing down people's perceptions of them?

I'd guess yes, but, then again, I've never had the opportunity to travel overseas to get any first hand knowledge.

 

[HarutoAsou]

it's true lowleg, the first time I came to Korea I had some people what wouldn't even talk to me because they wanted to know my nationality first. Being caucasian you are immediately labelled as an American. Afterwards I asked them why and they said if I was American they wouldn't have wanted to talk to me.

 

[Gaiarth]

I know that, as an Englishman, I tend to have been greeted quite well when I have visited Japan. One place a friend and I stayed, the old man running it actually turned to his wife in the back room and said "Good, they aren't Americans".

I think a lot of that is me benefiting from stereotyping of a more positive note, like an outdated view that the English are all mildly-spoken well-mannered gentlemen. I'm pretty sure I'd get a very different reaction if I went to certain parts of Spain or Greece, where the yobs go on holiday.