Favorite (funniest) titles?

[TakahashiKyoto]

Good evening everyone,

Am I the only one who thinks that some JAV (translated) titles are funny as hell?

While I still haven't found what I'm looking for (a crazy JAV title generator), let's have some fun with existing titles.

1. My contender for 'An effort was made' title

HUNTA-773 Studio Hunter - I Was Peeking Into The Bathroom, When I Witnessed A Mountain Range Of Exquisite Big Tits, And I Got Super Excited!! These Big Tits Young Wife Babes Were Exposing Themselves Freely At The Hot Spring Resort Bath, And Their Huge Titties Were Super

Not 100% sure but I think the movie may be about big tits.

(original title : お風呂を覗いたら絶景デカ乳山脈に大興奮！！温泉で開放的になった巨乳若妻たちの乗っかりオッパイが超絶スケベ！！ボクがバイトしている温泉旅館に…)

2. My contender for the 'I don't quite get everything' title

TTNK-14 Studio Tsuchinoko Cinderella And A Plethora Of Features And Elegant Madam Tits Kumiko Yamazaki Libido Kcup AV First Appearance Of Madame Miracle Amateur Tits Swaying Hmm Bururu Luxury Of Genuine Natural Miracle To Urahara

Bururu??
It's ぶるる～ん in the original title, and I still don't quite get the true meaning.

(original title : 上品な顔立ちとはウラハラに性欲過多の爆乳マダムは奇跡の正真正銘天然ぶるる～ん揺れる高級爆乳 素人マダム 奇跡のKcup AV初登場 山崎久美子)

3. My contender for the 'You are drunk too?' title

GDHH-051 Sister!Where It Was Pee! ?Are Pee At My Sister Came Home Drunk To Ridiculous! ?My Sister Was Drunk Does Not Have The Ear To Hear Also Note Ass Half-assed!Oma _ Pissing In Co Plain View State!I You've Seen A Figure Too Such Erotic Would Be Of Course Erection ...

Of course erection. Stupid me, what else could it be?

(original title : 姉ちゃん！どこでオシッコしてんだよ！？泥●して帰宅したお姉ちゃんがとんでもない所でオシッコしてる！？注意しても聞く耳を持たない酔っ払ったお姉ちゃんはお尻丸出し！オマ●コ丸見え状態で放尿！そんなエロ過ぎる姿を見てしまった僕は当然勃起してしまい…)

4. My contender for the 'WTF, is the online translation service broken again?' title

JUNY-003 Big-naked Tight Ass-fucked Housekeeper Iimaru Ichimaru Who Makes A Dense Meat-feeling Service In The Form Of Erotic Chicken With Soft Meat

'Erotic Chicken' would be an awesome name for a band but still...

(original title : 柔らかお肉がハミ出ちゃうエロコス姿で濃密な肉感サービスをしてくれる爆乳むっちり豊満家政婦 市丸ひめ)

and last for tonight

5. My contender for the 'Straight to the point' title

OHO-044 Studio Cherries When A Big Tits Girl In Glasses Changes Into A Yukata Who Cares If She Wears It Properly! I'm Getting Horny I Want To Grab Her Ass Fuck Her From Behind Grab Her Tits And Fuck The Shit Out Of Her! 100cm H Cup Size Yumi Nagasaku.

Almost reads like poetry... almost...

(original title : メガネボインが浴衣に着替えたら、着付けなんてどうなってもいい！ムラッとして、ケツまくって、立ちバックで、パイオツ鷲掴みしながら、ズボッと挿しまくりたくなった！ Hカップ100cm 永作ゆう美)

My mood got better
おやすみなさい

 

[Shinto1337]

the titles on javlibrary all seem to be autotranslated from japanese in english, thus making no sense.
Most of the time even the chinese titles make similar sense xD

 

[heterogoblin]

There is a twitter account which posts a lot of good ones: https://twitter.com/javdottxt?lang=en

 

[TakahashiKyoto]

There is a twitter account which posts a lot of good ones: https://twitter.com/javdottxt?lang=en

Awesome Twitter feed
I just checked and the first one made my day already : An Intelligent Anal Examination Survey A 2 Hole Furious Fuck Orgasmic Perverted Pussy Juice Squirting Special A Regional Medical Translator In Koriyama City Age 28 A Perverted Maso Bitch Who Scored Over 900 On Her TOE*C Exam

 

[TakahashiKyoto]

the titles on javlibrary all seem to be autotranslated from japanese in english, thus making no sense.
Most of the time even the chinese titles make similar sense xD

Yes, all of them are auto translated, though it's probably not Google Translate -- just checked, and the translations end up being different, sometimes much closer to the original title.
Still, can't they ask someone to actually check proof the translations? I mean, even if their English ability is even lower than my Japanese inability, don't tell me no-one actually realized that 'Erotic Chicken With Soft Meat' was bonkers.

 

[TakahashiKyoto]

this is human being translate or googletranslate ?

Totally machine translated. I didn't really pay attention to the dates, but 'quality' seem to have improved (I noticed that Google Translate has improved too).
Though, not all of them use the same tools, giving slightly different results

Here's a recent title

DVDMS-543 一人暮らしの女子大生の無防備な黒パンスト尻に我慢できずにバックからねじ込むデカチン即ハメ！足首をグイっと掴んで強引にイカせる膣奥激ピストンSEX！合鍵で勝手に侵入してきた変態大家がデカ尻JDに生中出し！

On javdoe (and others), added on May 17th 2020 :

This College Girl Is Living Alone Prancing Around In Black Pantyhose And I Couldn t Resist So I Pumped My Big Cock Into Her From Behind For A Quickie Then I Grabbed Her Ankles And Thrust Deep Into Her Pussy For Piston-Pounding Sex This Perverted Landlord Used His Spare Key To Get Busy With This Big Ass JD And Here s The Creampie Raw Footage To Prove It

On javland added on May 16th

I Can Not Stand The Unprotected Black Pantyhose Ass Of A Female College Student Living Alone And Screw It In From The Back Immediately! Vaginal Deep Piston Sex That Grabs The Ankle And Makes It Squid! A Perverted Landlord Who Invaded Without Permission With A Duplicate Key Made A Vaginal Cum Shot In A Big Ass Jd!

 

[periph]

Makes It Squid

I always wondered what the "squid" in machine-translated titles refers to. Is it Pussy?

Also, "best brush wholesale" in multiple video titles.

 

[TakahashiKyoto]

I always wondered what the "squid" in machine-translated titles refers to. Is it Pussy?

Also, "best brush wholesale" in multiple video titles.

For 'squid', it's イカれる in the original title.
I just checked Weblio and it seems to be a slang word meaning 'apeshit'

膣奥激 I think means 'vagina inside extremely' so in the correct order probably 'deep inside the pussy'

So basically he's grabbing her ankles tight and goes apeshit doing the PISTON SEX! (I suppose, hard/rough fuck) deep in her pussy.
Or 'going apeshit pouding her pussy'.
Something like this.

No idea about the 'best brush wholesale', I should have a title in kanji to have a look.
Maybe something like 'a lot of great pussies'?

 

[TakahashiKyoto]

Also, "best brush wholesale" in multiple video titles.

OK, I think I got it.
In Japanese, it's actually 極上筆おろし. Meaning is tricky but I may have the solution.
筆おろし means 'using a new brush for the first time' according to Weblio.
I thought maybe the girl is doing a dick for the first time but, actually, it seems the other way around : I've seen a few 'best brush wholesale' jav titles with a 'virgin man' tag.

 

[periph]

I've seen a few 'best brush wholesale' jav titles with a 'virgin man' tag.

thanks! that actually makes sense now. I found an example ABP-918 which confirms she takes dudes virginity so that is probably the right meaning.