Unrealistic expectations

Joelle

Active Member
Apr 24, 2008
699
49
It's pretty much a-fact-of-life that in some way, shape or form we're broken people.

At least this was/is the case for me.

I should speak only for me.

Battered and neglected people, people from unfortunate or misfortunate backgrounds.

We get shot off into another direction, very early on, and to meet our needs.

Since we can't get needs met in the usual way and format, i.e. from responsible people and parenting/authority figures.

Who betray, abuse, neglect, molest us.

We find an odd way to fill the need and void - for me it started with straight porn.

-But in doing so we actually continue our own previous victimization.

Then find camaraderie here, i.e. other broken people who contribute and share.

Sexual addiction is the very hardest thing to break, harder they say than opium derivatives.

We would have to want it very badly, and to break free of something that isn't good for us, doesn't enhance us, robs us of self-esteem - induces great shame/guilt.

You've hit on a nerve, but something important.

Some say a hospital program, an in patient setting, would be our only salvation.

This is the down side of the internet - and there are zillions of people now affected.

Click on a link and --- zam -- all of your needs are met.

You are loved, welcomed, needed, fuzzy music plays in the background, there are carnivals and beaches and parties, etc.

Every whim and fantasy is addressed.

Since you're being blunt, I'll be blunt as well.

Any kind of porn - any kind of sexual gratification - usually and often leads to despair.

Which resolves itself with a good post and justification on my part.

I know I can't be completely whole, until I take responsibility for this -

And I'm weak, way weaker than I care to admit.

p.s. There's also a strong feeling on the part of most clinicians.

That sexual addiction is about depression.

Self-medicating what's really and actually going on with us.

But it's like when you're really really hungry.

Do you eat an entire bag of cookies or potato chips.

Or do you put something healthy and appropriate into your system.

Cuz if you eat the potato chips?

In about an hour you'll want to die or throw yourself off of a building.

Same thing with this, at least on my part.




Joelle